Kyle in wonderland
by Panic-Revelation
Summary: Kyle gets casted as alice in the school play.Cartman begins to annoy Kyle about it.Kyle leaves the school building in annoyance only to chase after the "rabbit" then finds himself in wonderland.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1.  
Kyle Gets pushed down the rabbit-hole.

Kyle was starting to grow tired of Cartmans usual rude remarks, having no patience to deal with him the red head meekly set his book aside on the prop table.

"Hahaha I can't believe this!" Cartman gloated as he finished off the jumbo sized chip bag in his hand.

"Shut it fat ass!"

"AY I'm not fat you stupid Jew!"

"Your so fat that if you stood in the middle of a field people would mistake you for a mountain." Kenny add,taking off his signature orange parka. His voice raised loud enough for everyone to hear.

Hushed giggles filled the air then echoed off the stage as people went back to their respective jobs.

"At least I'm not poor like you Kenny!" Huffed the brunette.

"Fuck you." Replied Kenny in his usual apathetic tone.

Cartman ignored the blond, turning his attention back to Kyle.

"I still can't believe it Kahl! You must have the worst luck ever!" Cartman laughed, letting a satisfied smirk creep across his face.

Stan had quietly made his way towards the group. "Lay off fat ass!".

Cartman continued to talk, ignoring Stans blue eyed glare.

"Ay at least I'm not the one that has to wear a dress for this stupid play, what was it called again? Some Alice person in some weird land."

"It's called Alice in wonderland you stupid tub of lard." Kyle retorted, getting to his feet. His fist clenched at his sides. It was obvious that Kyle would get irritated but that's what Cartman always aimed for.

"There weren't enough girls to fill all the roles fat ass you know that! It's not Kyle's fault." Stan sighed ,as he tried to break off the argument.  
"I'm way to tired to deal with this.." Thought Kyle. "I'm going home." He added aloud as he shoved his books into his bag. Stan quickly turned to say something but kyle had already made it up the stairs and through the door.

"Just let him go he's probably just PMSing. Stupid Jew.." Cartmans words echoed through out the empty hallway.

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Kyle mumbled to himself as he opened the side door . The cold mountain air smacking him in the face. His eyes closed as the harsh glare of the sun reflected off the fresh snow on the field. He considered heading back to the school theater but quickly realized that the door had already closed behind him.  
After taking a few steps forward he found himself tumbling down a steep slope. Landing on his back as he reached the bottom, his eyes still closed.  
Kyle laid there for (what he guessed) to be five minutes before sitting up to brush the snow from his curly red hair.

"Jeez.." Kyle mumbled as he reached for his hat. "I must have the worst luck....IKE?!" Kyle Yelped as he watched his little brother hop across the field in front of him. Without a second thought Kyle started to his feet (At the time it seemed very natural for Ike to have rabbit ears and a little golden pocket watch.) Kyle chased after Ike, who quickly made his way down an unusually big hole. Kyle (whose eyes were filled with fear for his little brothers safety) began shouting "Ike! Ike are you Okay?!" . Clearly oblivious to the sound of feet walking towards him, he pulled at his cap nervously.  
Within moments Kyle was falling. Down, down,down he went, unable to register what had happened.

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Kyle grew tired of feeling mortifying fear and was now just bored and confused, Falling was beginning to feel natural to him. He placed one green gloved hand in his pockets nonchalantly "This seems oddly familiar..." he murmured to no one in particular. "If I'm going to continue falling I might as well have something to read." Thought Kyle aloud. He slowly scanned the area where the floor would have been, suddenly noticing the walls glowing a dim orange color. Kyle thought nothing of it. "Why are the walls made of bricks?" Kyle continued, remembering the moment he fell.  
Still looking down He noticed objects slowly coming into view, getting bigger and bigger as he continued his lengthy fall. It was a book shelf.  
Feeling a sliver of hope burn inside him, he quickly grabbed the first book in his reach. He's hope was quickly crushed as he began reading.

"It's a children's book." Sighed Kyle. "The room is to dimly lite to read anyway. I'll ruin my eye sight at this rate." he added feeling embarrassed at such an absurd excuse. It only embarrassed him further after realizing he was the only one falling. After what seemed like 10 minutes a small bedside table appeared below him. He set the book down as he passed the small wood table. (Kyle found it lucky that there was no one else with him to listen to his non-sense.)

Down, down, down he went, with nothing else to do. (by then he started dozing off) he slowly began to close his eyes when

THUD.

"what was that?!" Kyle yelp quickly getting to his feet. "I'm done falling...." he scratched his head through his cap. Carefully he brushed the dust from his backside,stared at the red cushioned chair(which he landed on) then went on down the oddly shaped tunnel (considering there was no where else to go but through it).

The sound of soft thud's grew louder as he made his way down the hall.

" Gah! She's gonna cut my ears off!! I'm so late!!" a voice echoed around the corner.

"Ike?!" Kyle shouted as he rushed around the corner,(only to find His brother already on his way up a flight of stairs).

Kyle dashed up the stairs. But to his unhappy surprise Ike was no longer insight, Instead : he found himself in a huge ballroom-like room. The hall was lit by low rows of lamps. Doors were found all around the hall (real or just painted on) they were all of course locked.  
He walked around the room once or twice, trying to open the doors (the real doors anyway). Slowly he grew impatient as each door stubbornly refused to open. Kyle quickly gave up , only to notice a small table sitting in front of an even smaller door.  
"How did I not notice that table there before?"

Kyle hesitantly reached for the small bottle that sat in the middle of the table. Half-heartedly he brought it to his lips and began drinking the contents(not caring what it could be.) Within moments Kyle found himself falling yet again but this time He landed in the small bottle.

"Hahahahaha This is to amusing!" crying a familiar voice through loud chuckles.

"Who..?" Dazed and still very confused Kyle got to his feet;beginning to look for the source of the laughter. His attention was immediately brought to a purple door.

The door in front of him was no longer small. In fact it was no longer a regular old door. A picture of a red and white striped hat was painted over it.

" Mr. Hat ?!" a hint of disbelief stained his voice.

The door just keep laughing and laughing.( Mr. Hat began crying as he laughed.)

"No! STOP Mr. Hat! Stop crying!!" Kyle shouted as the room began filling with water.  
Bad turned to worse as he drift into the wide-mouthed key-hole,still trapped in the bottle.

"how did this happen..." Kyle questioned as he drifted through a sea of tears.

"No chance of turning back now."


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: I'm sorry for not updating this for a long time D: I now have someone here to nag and b*itch at me to finish The chapters. An "Editor" If you well. Next chapter is gunna be LONG.

Chapter 2

Kyle in the pool of tears

"This is really starting to seem familiar" sighed Kyle as he slowly drift (in what he suspected to be) forward. "Stupid Mr. Hat... he didn't have to laugh so hard" Kyle muttered,looking over his right shoulder. Mr. Hat had already disappeared from sight but his laugh still echoed though his ears.  
"Drowning in Mr. Hat's tears... now _that_ would be quite the humiliating way to die."

Kyle gazed up at the Grey sky above. Purple-tinted clouds floated lazily across it, giving the illusion of a dome-like shape.  
"Hm, now that can't be right. Maybe I'm just getting seasick.." Thought Kyle as he leaned lightly over the mouth of his temporary boat.  
Just then he heard the sound of a familiar voice singing a little way off to his right. Kyle began paddling , getting nearer and nearer to the source: at first he thought it must be his brother, but then he remembered the tone of Ike's voice, the voice that floated on the water was shaky and sad. Much different from his brother. Soon he got close enough to make out the owner of the somber melody.

"mouse ears....? " Questioned Kyle as he gently floated closer towards the trembling silhouette. " Maybe I could ask him for directions...." (Kyle thought it weird for a person to be wearing mouse ears, He thought it stranger for a person to be wearing them out in the middle of the sea.)  
Drifting on a beaten up wood door was someone he knew well.

"TWEEK?!" Shouted Kyle as he leaned against the side of his glass ship (almost tipping the boat over in disbelief)

"GAH!!" Shrieked the shaky coffee addict, almost falling over the edge of his raft in shock.

"Whoa! calm down Tweek! Just wait a second. I'll be right there!" Stated Kyle,quickly paddling towards the quivering blond. Worry and fear for his friends safety filling his chest.  
Abandoning his glass boat for the solid raft Kyle quickly rushed to the helpless blond(who was now waist deep in his soon to be cold watery grave)

" Ngggh! I DON'T WANNA D-DIE GAH!"wailed Tweek, desperately grabbing at the whatever was available. "I'm not gonna let you die! Stop flailing around" Replied Kyle grabbing Tweek by the arms and pulling him back up onto the raft.

Kyle waited patiently as the terrified Tweek calmed down.

"So how'd ya get all the way out here Tweekers?" Asked the redhead, lowering his voice to a hushed tone. A sudden jerk from the blond signaled an impending outburst.

"Nggh h-how do you know My, ngh, nickname??!" He gasped dramatically, Pulling at his unkempt mess of hair.

" Oh, I'm sorry It's just... calm down already..!" Replied Kyle frantically. "Do... do you like cats...?" He asked curiously, only to have the coffee nut leap back in horrifying terror.

"GAH! C-CATS?!" he shrieked " Oh sweet Jesus! No! I've N-Never liked him, ngggh Oh god this is way too much pressure, _ngh_" He stated, tugging furiously at his poorly buttoned vest. " ngh oh man, I ne-never liked him, It- I- and then he.. OH GOD I don't like him!!" he continued, Face flushed a stunning red from ear to ear.

" Whoa, whoa you gotta chill out man, I promise no more cat chats." said Kyle in a soothing tone.

"urk. We- we're almost there." squealed Tweek pointing his finger a little way off to Kyle's left.

"Almost where?" asked Kyle truly baffled.

"Ngh to shore."


End file.
